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Friday, June 22, 2012

So You Want to Be a Pirate? Lesson 2: Pirate Etiquette


Most of you are probably wondering what sort of etiquette pirates have. I assure you, Pirates aren't the crazy madmen you thought they were at all. In fact, there's almost a Pirate Code for general manners... (This is all historically accurate, right, Swordroll?)

Here are five quick etiquette rules that every pirate should follow!
First over all, if this wasn't already clear, never make offensive remarks about another crew member.

Always remember - your crew members are your lifeline on the boat. Without them, you'd be captain hopeless. You need a good crew to sail across the seven skies of Pirate101!

Anyway, there's no good reason to call your good crewmates names... unless they stole yer grub! Then, it is perfectly proper to boil their scurvy pirate skin in oil. In fact, it is recommended.


Second, don't repeatedly shout or ask to fire the cannons!

Firing the cannons (and shouting, for that matter) have always been privileges on pirate vessels! Don't abuse them!

Blackbeard himself loved cannons... or rather, cannon fuses, dipped in lime water and placed under his hat to make him look more intimidating (kids, don't try this on your own ship)!

As a crew member, it is your job to keep others in line. Make sure that you and others are following this rule, because failure to do so may result in a mid-morning walking of the plank, even though there's no historical evidence to suggest that pirates ever walked the plank. I should really leave this bit out, it ruins the effect.


Third, never leave your ship or post unattended!

Everything you work for as a pirate rests in your ship. If all of your loot is plundered, and all of your shipmates captures, you still have the one thing that started your piracy!

Of course, if you've already died or been hit by a cannonball, please, just quietly remove yourself from the vessel to avoid any concern or worry otherwise.

If you plan on abandoning your ship, please notify the captain so that he can help you check out.

Fourth, always obey the person in charge of the vessel, usually your captain.

The captain works hard at sitting around assisting the crew, so give him some credit!

Of course, if a captain breaks his Pirate Code (e.g. won't go down with his ship, etc.), won't share his grub, or is otherwise disruptive, it is perfectly acceptable to flip the table in anger.

When taking part in a mutiny, keep the mess to a minimum, and waste as little time as possible throwing the captain overboard.

Fifth, and finally, always talk PROPERLY like a pirate.

Remember, he's not your dad, he's your salty sea dog 'o a father!

And that other crew member over there isn't your old friend. He's your barnacle-covered bucko!

Proper pirate speak is necessary at all times! If ye ever find a pirate speakin' improperly, send him to his grave! send the scurvy dog off th' plank an into Davy Jones' treasure chest!

Remember to be kind about it, though, as all pirates should.

Keep practicing your pirate etiquette and you'll have it down in no time! Thanks for reading and see you in the Spiral!

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